When God Blocks It...

Today as I was driving back home from visiting my family it began to rain. It was just me and the boys and they had finally settled down from fighting sleep and I entered into a place of worship and dialogue with God. He began to take me back to the moment when I wanted to mend the broken pieces of my life and fill the voids with a relationship with my father that I came so close to meeting him but God blocked it.

The Mother: Fear-The Thief of Life's Best Moments

Somewhere along the way of this motherhood journey I became bound by fear. Not the type of fear that is centered around the specifics of the children but instead the specifics of me: my words, my actions, my disconnect, my uncertainty, my expression of love, how I interact, my wisdom, my mortality. I became so engulfed with being afraid of life vanishing from my body, that I began to feel like I wasn't living life.

I've always had more fear than faith; a very scary kid and sometimes a scary adult. The details of my story made my glass seem half empty and I carried that with me into motherhood. Trying to pull optimism from places of unfamiliarity, fear began to rob me of moments the minute I found out I was pregnant.

The Woman: Unveiling God's Strength (t-shirt)

For the last few months God has been dropping random sentences in my spirit.

They all have related to the importance of our story.
Last week, as I was reading over them, I kept thinking how awesome it would be to have these words on a shirt to make a declaration of what He's done in our lives through our journey and testimony.

So I sat down and came up with some designs, got super excited and then sent a text to my village. When I sent them the screenshots they were just as excited as I was.

I'm offering them through a campaign because it was such an easy process for everyone when I did the nomakeup tshirts.

Order your shirt here!

The Woman: Your Story Doesn't Have to be Perfect. It Just Has to be Heard...

A friend (and Soror) of mine, Torrie Chatman, founded the women's ministry Beloved. She called me back in November and asked if I would share my story in January for their Remove The Makeup series on the topic of the impact witnessing Domestic Violence has on children. Before she called, God told me that I would be sharing this story but I would have to go deeper than what I've done before. I didn't know why he was giving me this "heads up" but when she called I knew I needed to say yes. Of course after we hung up I thought what in the world did I just say yes to. But God reminded me that when He called me to be transparent and "remove the makeup" that didn't come with any exceptions. Ouch. The enemy tried to discourage me for the months leading up to the event but I had to keep reminding myself that God is strategic and that there was healing and freedom on the other side of my testimony, for another woman. Thinking about those who are still suffering in silence, bound by grief, guilt, shame, confusion, and emptiness, I became more excited about going deeper into my story than I thought I would.

5 Ways To Recognize When God Is Shifting You Into the Next Thing.

Yesterday I woke up to thirty-one. As a naturally introspective person, especially reflective on my birthday, I decided to write this long overdue post (emphasis on long). This last year has been a whirlwind and I mean that with a joyful heart. I became a mother of two, traded in my Lexus for a compact car and left my job at NASA because God told me to.
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